The traits that attract
June 6th, 2011
When you’re with other people, whether it’s in the board room with peers, with a potential client, or even with family and friends, it can be tempting to try to be the smartest person in the room; the one who’s always right or has all the answers, in order to gain respect. Think again. In a thought-provoking editorial in The Boston Globe, columnist Gareth Cook writes about why humans were initially attracted to and then refined through selective breeding the creature we now consider our best friend: the dog. An animal’s approachability and friendliness were the desirable traits, not intelligence. What a valuable lesson we humans can remember and apply when we’re trying to attract and build relationships with other humans, achieve our goals, and build our businesses. Far better to hone our approachability, courteousness, kindness, and loyalty than expend untold energy trying to be smarter, craftier, or more clever than everyone else.
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June 6th, 2011 at 8:48 am
I have found this to be true in Seedling’s Board Development and training. Collaboration, respectful exchanges of ideas and the willingness of the group to be kind and courteous even when they have differing views have made this group of people truly outstanding to work with.
We value these qualities, and so we attract them and they become our corporate culture. I think this is true no matter what area of your life you are considering.
That said, I am a cat person, so I guess I can handle some lack of approachability as well!
June 6th, 2011 at 11:25 am
I couldn’t agree more that approachability is the solution to a successful career. I’ve built my professional relationships from a personal level, and am fortunate to say my clients have been with me since opening my practice in January of 2006. My mission has been to invest in my client’s goals for success by establishing mutually respected, positively genuine, and satisfying relationships. Integrity and dependability are other key traits that go a long way for a successful career.
June 7th, 2011 at 4:47 am
Such smart advice. I always told my kids that being right feels good for 15 minutes, but the damage wrought may last a lifetime.
Having suffered and overcome an inferiority complex, this one is hard for me.
Thanks Patti.
June 7th, 2011 at 3:47 pm
Approachability, a big smile, kindness, genuine interest in others – ought to be a no-brainer for us humans in all our relationships. No wonder we dog lovers adore our pooches so much – they remind us of what matters.
If you haven’t yet read The Art of Racing in the Rain, get it and be prepared for more lessons from a canine!
Thanks for your wise words, Patti.